Saturday, May 29, 2010

Monday Morning Ramblings...

I looked at myself in the mirror last night.  I looked old and I looked very tired!  I had just come off of a 30 hour famine Friday and Saturday with some of my awesome H20 friends and then lead worship for two services on Sunday morning and then did H20 youth service Sunday evening! The whole weekend was such a blessing!  So many lives were touched and changed by God because a few people decided to go and be like Jesus. But man, am I tired! 

So, after all of the busyness of the weekend wears off, here I am at the Beautiful letdown of Monday.  After searching high and low for four months for new employment I have come up empty.  I am feeling like I am back to square one.  Several opportunities in which I had high expectations simply just didn't pan out.  The timing wasn't right.  I am trusting in God 100%, but so far I don't see what God can see.  My heart is still pumping.  My eyes are squinting to see past the horizon (no pun intended) but I can't.  I'm not supposed to. It is difficult but I am to trust Him explicitly!  Do I?  Do I really believe that God is going to provide all my needs according to His riches and glory or am I going to start carrying a burden that was not meant for me to carry.

A friend posted an update to pray for him to find a job a few months ago.  Some "not so friendly" friend replied back sarcastically that he needed to quit praying and get off his "behind" and find a job.  As I read the reply I felt angry and disappointed that the person didn't get it.  There is a balance.  I have to do all I know to do.  I have to bang on doors, make phone calls, email people I've never even met to let people know I'm looking for a job.  But, the rest is up to God!  Prayers work, and prayers get answered.  It may not be as quickly or exactly the way we envision things working out but God is faithful.

I'm waiting for my Father.  I am waiting...

1 I waited patiently for the Lord to help me,
  and he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the pit of despair,
  out of the mud and the mire.
He set my feet on solid ground
  and steadied me as I walked along.
3 He has given me a new song to sing,
  a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see what he has done and be amazed.
  They will put their trust in the Lord 

Psalm 40:1-3 NLT

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