What Seems Impossible to Us is Possible for God

26Jesus looked at them intently and said, “Humanly speaking, it is impossible. But with God everything is possible.” Matthew 19:26 NLT

This scripture in my estimation really clarified something for me.  Right before this scripture Jesus is talking about how hard it is for a rich man to enter into heaven.  But then, it says here that Jesus looked intently at them.  intent means having the mind and the will focused on a specific purpose.  In this case Jesus' mind and will was focused on His disciples.  Having that kind of attention is amazing even if he didn't say anything after he gazed at them.  But his words were directed to his disciples.  If you are a disciple, listen up!  We need to understand that God's ways are not our ways.  Period.  If He decides to show up in the miraculous, it's because the Father intended to do that.  If He doesn't, it's okay!  What's important here is the fact that Jesus attention is focused on His disciples.  His gaze is upon us.  Jesus.  Looking intently.  Wow.  Thanks God for showing us your love by gazing intently and letting us know that with you EVERYTHING is possible.  The impossible is possible for God.

Prayer: Let your will be done in my life and the lives of your disciples.

It's a New Day

It's been four months since my life turned upside down.  My life will never be the same.   I'm reading a book right now called A Place of Wonder: Preparing Yourself for Suffering: A Place for Weakness by Michael S. Horton.  One great quote from this book is the fact that "Our weaknesses really are an opportunity for God to show his strength." I started meditating on this early this morning and realized that God's strength is more than a nice peaceful thought.  God wants to show himself strong in our lives.  As I thought about this I looked back over the last few months and marvel at how God answered all the prayers that were lifted up.

I realized that there were people literally all over the world that responded to our plea for prayers.  We saw people respond to our need, inside and outside of the church.  God uses people in our lives for his purposes.

Missy was the "rock" during this ordeal.  She pretty much waited upon me hand and foot plus looked after the family and still kept up with her kindergarten class as she sent sub plans each day.

During this time she hid her own grief over the situation and purposed to be strong for the rest of us.  It was amazing to see how she responded in the midst of the battle that we were all thrown into at the beginning of the year.  We both didn't realize that the grief went so deep until my daughter got sick with Scarlett fever about three months after my surgery.  Her body was covered in red bumps and she was in so much pain she couldn't even swallow.  It was too much for Missy to bear.  Not another situation. One person can only handle so much.  And that was the moment that I believe that God stepped in and held her up and let her know how much she loved her.  I was able to shoulder the load with her and but God was the one that took her and showed her his undeniable power to provide peace in a situation that was pretty unsettling.

As we unload our burden's to the Lord he replaces that burden with peace and prepares us for the next battle.  Life is hard.  But God's strength is evident in the journey, if we are willing to give it over to Him.

Horton says, "Without trials, faith is not really roused to grab hold of the God of promise."

True.

An Affair of the Heart Part III

Tomorrow is my four week mark since I had open heart surgery.  I wish I could tell everyone that I'm back to normal but I have another 8 weeks to go according to doctors before I can confess this.  Everyone now has returned to their normal routines.  Missy will go back to work this week and then I'm left alone to get well.  I'm on a variety of medications and the doctor's seem to think it's fun to play around with my dosages.  I started taking double what I normally took last Friday and my blood pressure went way up and my pain factor seemed to get more intense.  Maybe I'm trying to get back in the swing of things too soon.  I feel like I'm starting to feel better then I take two steps backward.  Today was one of those take two steps backward kind of days.  I did one task today and then I totally went back in bed and rested the rest of the day.  (don't you wish you could do that?)

I liken this to my spiritual walk.  I take my dosage of spending time with God and expect my life to take a turn for the better.  Instead I seem to move forward and then there's the feeling that I'm not making any progress spiritually at all.  So, how do I become heart healthy in my spiritual life?  I know that for my physical heart I have to be on a heart healthy diet which is low in sodium and like my physical heart my spiritual heart needs to be on a healthy diet.   I need to be in the word and not just say I did a quiet time and then start eating junk food the rest of the day.  I need to get some real "meat" in my diet and start to chew on it, think about it and apply it to my life and most importantly ask the Holy Spirit to fill me and speak to me and lead me.  Life change happens when I decide to allow God the reigns of my life and start to say "yes" to him.  I need to keep asking him for more, please!

An Affair of the Heart Part II

It's been almost three weeks since my surgery.  I've had a lot of time to reflect and to see God's blessings in the midst of this.  I received this Psalm from my cousin, Becca who is familiar with trusting God in the midst of the heart issues of my Uncle, her Dad.  Before both surgeries I found myself saying this scripture over and over and asking God to show his mercy in this situation.

Whatever situation that we find ourselves we know that we have a refuge in Him, if you've committed your life into His hands.  You have a destiny in Him.  The reality of this was never more tangible than when I lay in that hospital bed waiting for a life saving procedure that has allowed me to have a new lease on life.  Thanks God, Thanks Surgeons, and thanks to my family, church family and friends!!!  Be encouraged...

A psalm of David.

1Keep me safe, O God,

for I have come to you for refuge.

2I said to the Lord, “You are my Master!

Every good thing I have comes from you.”

3The godly people in the land

are my true heroes!

I take pleasure in them!

4Troubles multiply for those who chase after other gods.

I will not take part in their sacrifices of blood

or even speak the names of their gods.

5Lord, you alone are my inheritance, my cup of blessing.

You guard all that is mine.

6The land you have given me is a pleasant land.

What a wonderful inheritance!

7I will bless the Lord who guides me;

even at night my heart instructs me.

8I know the Lord is always with me.

I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me.

9No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice.

My body rests in safety.

10For you will not leave my soul among the dead

or allow your holy one to rot in the grave.

11You will show me the way of life,

granting me the joy of your presence

and the pleasures of living with you forever.

(Psalm 16 NLT)

An Affair of the Heart

It's 02/08/13

Wow, what a journey the past couple of months have been.  I want to share some things that I've been thinking.  As a pastor it's easy to get caught up in everyone else's situations and neglect your own self and that's exactly what happened to me.

On December 24, 2012 I was helping load the truck with music and sound equipment and my chest started tightening up.  Thinking that this was acid reflux symptoms I kept on going.  My chest tightened up again and for the next month I kept having these acid reflux like symptoms.  At Missy's urging I went to our family physician and he did a routine EKG and even said he was 95% sure it was acid reflux.  However, the EKG showed an anomaly.  This prompted a visit to the Heart specialist and he ordered up a nuclear stress test.  That showed some signs that something wasn't right with my heart.  They signed me up for a left heart catheterization.  This test is to check and see if there are any blockages in the arteries of the heart.  The cool thing is if they find something normally they can go in and put a stint in to open up the artery.  I came out of the surgery with the doctor looking concerned.  He said, that I needed a quadruple bypass surgery.  One artery was completely blocked.  Another was 95% Another was 80% and the final one was 75% blocked.  From a simple EKG abnormality to Quadruple by pass surgery.  Surreal.

The surgery was scheduled for the next day.  I didn't even have time to think about it which was probably a good thing.  The family came in and Missy's eyes were red from crying.  Maggie was quietly confident and saying that God has got this.  Justin on the other hand just fell on my feet and started sobbing.  I couldn't hold it in.  I lost it.  All of a sudden realized my mortality.  There are so many things running through my mind.  They say open heart surgery is routine. They do thousands of these things, but I say, it's routine unless you are the one that's getting the surgery!

The doctors and nurses were amazing and my anesthesiologist (one nurse called her the cocktail waitress) did such a great job.  I remember my ride to surgery and then the next thing I know is that they are taking the airway out without any problems and the surgery was done in just 4 /12 hours.  

I feel like I have a new lease on life.  Everyday is a blessing    For my next few blog entries  I want to explore some things that God has shown me through this process.  I realize that God has a purpose for my life and I know he has purpose for yours.  Hopefully you won't have to go through a life threatening situation to realize this, but everything came into focus when this happened to me.